85 Americans are Already Running for President

Tuesday, February 08, 2011
Presidential candidate Jonathon "The Impaler" Sharkey
None of the favorites to run for President next year has officially filed as a candidate, but that doesn’t mean the nation doesn’t already have dozens of citizens who are ready to serve. They don’t have any money, but they do have catchy names.
Of the 85 Americans who have already filed paperwork with the Federal Election Commission to run for president in 2012, a few candidates sport familiar names, such as George Washington Williams of Youngstown, Ohio, and Rutherford Bert Hayes of Pea Ridge, Arkansas. There’s also Jeff Howard Taft Davis of Saint Helen, Michigan, whose name conjures up memories of the nation’s 27th president, William Howard Taft, and the man who led the Confederacy, Jefferson Davis.
Then, there are those who went for leadership titles in their names, like Warren Roderick President Ashe, a Democrat from Newport News, Virginia; Jonathon “The Impaler” Sharkey, a Republican from Temple Terrace, Florida; Ole Savior, a Republican from Minneapolis; and, perhaps best of all, President Emperor Caesar of Tampa, Florida.
Some of the candidates have already announced their qualifications. For example, in his candidate statement, Elder William Dolphus Shaw says, “I understand and know everything that’s happening out there.”
-Noel Brinkerhoff, David Wallechinsky
List of Candidates (Federal Elections Commission)


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